Alec Baldwin Reveals He Was Diagnosed with PTSD After Halyna Hutchins 'Rust' Shooting Tragedy — And Declares He's 'Happier' When Unconscious
Baldwin is seen breaking down in tears as he recounts the deadly 'Rust' set shooting on 'The Baldwins.'
Feb. 21 2025, Published 7:00 p.m. ET
Alec Baldwin has PTSD following the accidental on-set shooting of Rust cinematographer Halyna Hutchins, RadarOnline.com can reveal.
The actor, who saw his involuntary manslaughter charge dismissed, said on the first episode of his reality show that he is still haunted by the tragedy.
Although the case was dismissed, the actor still has mounting legal bills.
The Baldwins premieres this weekend on TLC, and in a preview of the first episode, wife Hilaria revealed The Shadow star, who already suffers from OCD, is still not his former self.
She confessed: "Everyone who is close to Alec has seen his mental health decline. He was diagnosed with PTSD, and he says in his darkest moments, 'If an accident had to have happened this day, why am I still here? Why couldn't it have been me?'"
The accident happened on October 27, 2021 on the New Mexico set of the Western period piece. Baldwin claimed the six-round gun he was handed for a scene went off without him pulling the trigger, fatally shooting Hutchins and wounding another. After charges against him were dismissed last summer, prosecutors announced they would not attempt to try him again.
The mystery remains how the pistol got loaded with live ammo instead of blanks.
Baldwin is cash-strapped since the 'Rust' set shooting.
As the first episode reveals, Baldwin is still struggling to come to terms with it all. In a confessional, he admitted: "This past year was just terrible. There were times I'd lay in bed. I'd go, 'Wow, my kids. I can't get up.'
"That's not like me. I'm not like that at all, not in any way am I like that. Never."
The Emmy winner revealed often, he would rather have been unconscious: "I said, 'I'm happier when I'm asleep than when I'm awake.'"
Alec called the entire situation surreal, adding that he felt worse for his wife.
He said: "I can't even believe that we're going through this, and I always feel more in pain about you than me, because I think to myself, well, you know, I'm going to try to my best to just get through it, and I think what it's done to you and how much it's hurt you and everything."
Baldwin credited his family, featured in the reality show, for helping him heal.
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Hilaria shared the credit with their large family, including daughters Ilaria Catalina Irena, two; María Lucía Victoria, three; Carmen Gabriela, 11; and sons Eduardo "Edu" Pao Lucas, four; Romeo Alejandro David, six,; Leonardo Ángel Charles, seven; and Rafael Thomas, nine.
She said: "I look at the kids, and I see how hard we're trying to create happy for them, even if we're masking stuff for ourselves.
"I know that what we're going through is maybe unique, but every family goes through hard times, and that's something that we can feel a community of support, knowing that the best that we can do is do our best and try to make our kids happy, and so that's what we're doing."
Baldwin agreed: "Honestly, from the bottom of my soul, I don't know where I'd be if I didn't have you and these kids going through this. I never would have made it with this. Sometimes I'd say, 'Why did I have seven kids? Why do we have seven kids?' And I realize, to help carry me and you through this situation."
