But in her 20’s, the beloved comedienne loved the fast life— and spills all about her party past in her new memoir, Yes, Please.
“I tried cocaine, which I instantly loved but eventually hated,” the Saturday Night Live alum, 44, confesses in a chapter titled “Obligatory Drug Stories.” “Cocaine is terrific if you want to hang out with people you don’t know very well and play Ping-Pong all night. It’s bad for almost everything else…The day after cocaine is rough.”
The Parks & Recreation actress also confesses she dabbled in ecstasy, also known as “Molly.”
“I remember a wonderful UCB (comedy group United Citizens Brigade) New Year’s Eve party where we all danced and drank water and loved each other,” she recalls. “I also remember the next day when I thought I had no friends and I was so sad I wanted to sink into the carpet and permanently live there.”
Now that she is a single mother to Archie, nearly 6, and Abel, 4, Poehler says she can no longer handle the drug-induced hangovers.
“The next day is the thing I can’t pull off anymore,” she admits. How do you explain to a 4- and 6-year-old that you can’t play Rescue Bots because you have to spend all day in bed eating Cape Cod potato chips and watching The Bicycle Thief?”
While she’s given up the harder drugs, the funnywoman says she still smokes marijuana— but only occasionally.
“I can’t perform, drive or write stoned, and therefore I smoke pot a lot less than I used to,” the busy mom reveals.
She concludes the candid chapter with lessons she learned on mushrooms.
“Everyone needs love, never hurt a living thing and don’t worry about the choices you make because everything will be fun because life is a closet filled with pool toys,” Poehler says.
For more of Poehler’s wild stories, pick up hilarious read Yes, Please in bookstores on October 28.