The reality of divorce is finally sinking in for Tamra Barney, who shares her feelings over the end of her marriage with Real Housewives of Orange County castmate, Vicki Gunvalson, and RadarOnline.com has a clip of their emotional heart-to-heart.
Tearful Tamra announces that her marriage is almost over, and that, "I will be signing my divorce papers next week and it's been a longtime coming but now I'm like, 'oh s**t! Here we go!'"
As RadarOnline.com previously reported, Tamra's husband, Simon Barney, filed for divorce in January 2010, charging Tamra with infidelity.
In the bombshell divorce papers Simon wrote: “Petitioner contends that Respondent has been verbally abusive and has committed acts of disloyalty and infidelity.”
But, despite the obvious bad blood between the former couple, which includes her filing for a restraining order against Simon, Tamra is still finding it hard to let go of their relationship.
"When you think about marriage… your kids, your life, your wedding day… and when you sign the divorce papers it's all over, it's all done," she laments.
"I think whether your marriage works or not it's sad to walk away from something, you feel like a failure. I've been with Simon for fifteen years, that's a big chunk of my life and to know that it's all over by signing these papers is difficult."
The beautiful blonde mother-of-four goes on to blame herself for the breakdown of their marriage.
"It's hard when you have little kids not to take all the blame as a parent because you're devastating their lives," she says. "I just feel like a failure, as a mother it just sucks so bad."
Tamra and Simon have three children together, Sidney, 11, Spencer, 10, and Sophia, 5. She also has a 24-year-old son, Ryan, from a previous relationship.
“Tamra has been telling her friends that the third time is a charm and that Eddie is her Prince Charming,” a source told RadarOnline.com.
Tamra Barney's Divorce Settlement: No Spousal Support & Ordered To Be Civil To Ex-Husband