Dean McDermott Popped Pills and Hoped He Wouldn't Wake Up After Announcing Tori Spelling Split
Dean McDermott suffered a scary wake-up call after he posted — and quickly deleted — his separation announcement to the shock of his wife of 17 years, Tori Spelling, RadarOnline.com can reveal.
The Chopped Canada host, 57, recalled taking "six to seven Ambien" and going to bed after angering his wife and devastating the kids with his June announcement.
"My worst memory with Tori is that last fight when I was drunk and angry," he said. "It was the night that I raged against her and the children and I saw the light, the final flicker of the flame go out in her eyes."
McDermott opened up about his relationship with Tori in an interview with Daily Mail, revealing he's been living a sober lifestyle since the blowup.
"I posted that because I was at the end of my rope. I didn't know what to do. I had burned everything down yet again," he revealed, adding Spelling was caught off guard by the post. McDermott said when he realized the trauma he caused his family, he removed it — but the damage was already done, and he spiraled.
"I was literally at my wit's end. That night, I was drinking and I was into my pills," he admitted. "After I sent the post, I took some more pills, and I took six or seven Ambien in the hopes that I would not wake up.
"Thank God I did. Thank God I did. Because I would've ruined so many lives if I had died."
McDermott said the experience "got people's attention. The people I needed it to. It fell in the ears of people I wanted it to fall into." He is currently living in a sober living home with eight other men, revealing his longtime abuse of alcohol and drugs led to issues in his marriage.
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"I would initiate fights, absolutely. There would be arguments about issues that most couples have. Just the day-to-day struggles of being parents and being a couple," McDermott stated, adding their money issues didn't help his addictions.
"There are also our financial issues. Yes. But they would also stem from my depression and self-loathing. Normal fights that couples have would be elevated because of my anger and drinking."
He said he's going above and beyond to make his mistakes up to his loved ones.
"It takes two, and right now I am hugging the cactus. I'm apologizing and I'm doing all the right things," the actor shared. "I'm doing what was asked of me and beyond. I got into treatment because they wanted me to go."
Spelling's estranged husband said he's "never been happier in my life" despite their separation and being "broke." Both McDermott and Spelling have been spotted cozying up to other people during the split, and Dean revealed he wants Tori to be happy with whoever she chooses.
"If it continues, I just want happiness for her because she deserves so much happiness in this life because she's given so much to other people," he said during the interview. "She's given it to me for 18 years and I've been so hard and brutal on her that I just want her to be loved and happy. She deserves it."