On episode 11 of The Real Housewives of Orange County it seemed all that the ladies could do was scream, drop f-bombs and talk about their boobs.
The show opened with Kelly Dodd making a cast of her extra-large breasts before getting a reduction surgery, and ended with everyone eating a boob cake at her bizarre gathering.
"I'm getting a boob reduction," Kelly admitted. "My boobs are way too big for my body. They're too big, I can't take it."
"Ricky was my best friend," she told Lydia, "but when I didn't invite him to my baptism he started to send me messages that he was going to destroy my life."
"They're just bottom feeders who can say whatever they want," she said about the group at Vicki's party. "I am finally in a good place with my daughter and my ex-husband and now my daughter's going to read Eddie is a homosexual. The kids don't need to see this," she said as she broke down crying.
The pair discussed Shannon Beador, and Lydia admitted that she didn't like her, sniping: "She's very high maintenance." Tamra agreed, joking that she would get "like 25 phone calls a day," from her alleged best friend.
Peggy Sulahian's breast reconstructive surgery pre-op appointment was shown, as she revealed her motivation. "I'm in a lot of pain all the time with these expanders. This process leading up to my reconstructive surgery has been challenging but I deal with it because I want my body back."
Shannon forged ahead with opening a restaurant, despite her husband David Beador's disapproval. Since her marriage seemed to be crumbling, however, she decided she needed a project of her own.
"I'm starting this restaurant because my relationship can't be the thing that defines my happiness," she confessed. "Whether David is interested in me or not, opening this restaurant is going to make me very happy."
Lydia and her husband, Doug McLaughlin, headed to the doctor's office for a pre-op meeting regarding his vasectomy.
"I have no qualms about believing in Jesus and taking birth control pills but I don't want to have to take a pill for the next 10 years," she admitted. "Our faith encourages the man to take control and I'm ready for him to cut off his balls," she joked, "I'm excited no more babies!"
Then, the drama started brewing.
Kelly hosted a beach volleyball party and invited all the women except Meghan Edmonds, who was shown spending time with her baby daughter and cousin, not really caring about missing the party.
Tamra and Shannon showed up together, without their spouses, while Lydia and Peggy brought their husbands. Vicki's boyfriend Steve Lodge also tagged along.
"I have some anxiety about Tamra," Vicki admitted. "Sometimes I wish we could just go back to where we were."
Judge wasn't exactly of the same mind.
"I would rather have an enema made of nails than hang out with Vicki Gunvalson," she confessed.
As Vicki stressed about the situation, her boyfriend tried to calm her down: "Enjoy the people you enjoy being with. Not everybody's gonna sic like you."
Back at Kelly's house, the booze was flowing and emotions were running high. As she and Tamra talked about Vicki, Tamra started crying and admitted all the tension was truly affecting her.
"I don't know what the right thing to do is," she cried, but Shannon slammed their mortal enemy.
"She is just an evil person ," Shannon assured her.
Kelly, Tamra and Vicki then tried to hash things out, but it all quickly turned into a vile screaming match.
"I didn't have anything to do with Ricky coming, he wasn't even on my list and you know it," Vicki yelled at Tamra. I did not invite Ricky. You know my heart."
Tamra quickly shot her down. "I do not know your heart," and Vicki unleashed a tirade.
"You conquered and divided my entire group of friends. You almost cost me my life and my business because you called me a con woman. I don't want to go backwards. I am not a victim. It was never about you at my party," she screamed.
An unusually calm Tamra asked Vicki why she was so angry, after which the housewife lost her temper even more.
"I'm tired of you calling me a victim, and I'm tired of you putting sh*t out there to all my friends, I'm tired of it. Don't act like a victim Tamra," she angrily replied.
Shannon decided to butt in and stir the pot with Tamra, who asked Vicki "Why are you so nasty?"
"I'm tired of the mean girl sh*t. I did not lie about cancer. I was lied to," Vicki said. Shannon kept insisting that she lied, after which Vicki brought up her co-star's abusive relationship.
"You are a liar that your husband beat you," she screamed, "I have the proof. You want the proof? I'm tired of them calling me a liar about this damn f**king scam. I wasn't in on the scam."
Shannon ripped into Vicki, saying "She is so f**king delusional. She's absolutely f**king sick."
Vicki stormed out of the house as the rest of the wives sat at a table together, with Shannon making snide remarks under her breath, irritating Lydia and Peggy.
Lydia called Shannon out. "Tamra asked me if I got a boob job and while we're talking about it Shannon squeezed Tamra's leg under the table. They were making fun of me," she explained. Then, when Shannon asked if she was angry she fessed right up!
"You're being crazy," Lydia said. "We're done. I'm done with you."
Despite being her best friend, Tamra wasn't very nice about Shannon. "I don't know why Shannon is lashing out. I know that there are problems between her and David," she gossiped.
"I love Shannon dearly and she's always getting into these situations and I can't always be there to bail her out," Tamra admitted
The episode ended with most of the women not speaking to each other – but at least they were done screaming!
Stay with Radar for weekly recaps of all the insane drama on The Real Housewives of Orange County.
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