This week on Kate Plus 8, competition is in the air!
Hipster daughter Mady Gosselin,13, loves vinyl, vintage, the color grey, belittling her mother Kate Gosselin (impossible), and redecorating her room (ironically made possible with her mother's credit card).
Consequently, the mother-daughter duo goes antique shopping for the third episode of TLC's hit-show. While antiquing, Mady discovers cute bedside tables as Kate loses whatever dignity she had left by referring to multiple statues as her betrothed.
"Are you saying this is my second husband?" Kate asks the room as she points to a wooden Native American statue.
If that wasn't embarrassing enough for the so-called "monster mom," Mady is always reliable in pointing out the obvious, "I can't wait until you get remarried so we don't have to hear these jokes anymore."
Kate loves rules. Kate loves team building. So what does she have her family do on Kate Plus 8 this week? A blind picnic basket challenge a la Top Chef, of course. Oh producers of Kate Plus 8, you are so very clever!
The eight children are split into teams. Each team is instructed to make a savory dish and delicious dessert dish with five ingredients. Team leaders are picked by birthright — Mady and Cara take the role of team leaders, each picking who will be their teammates one-by-one.
Soon into the game, Kate's competitive nature rears its ugly head.
The reality star's so-called sage advice to her children is, "Be a team and win!"
Not missing a beat, and keeping this show almost single-handedly afloat, Hannah asks, "Isn't it about having fun?" To which Kate responds, "Winning is fun! That's my motto."
Mady rolls her eyes, "Well, we didn't notice." She notices. Everyone has noticed that Kate has pegged child against child, team against team, for her own enjoyment.
In all fairness to both teams, the ingredients Kate and babysitter Andrea put in the baskets were baffling; scallions, tunafish, tortillas, sesame oil and some other miscellany. In the end, because "winning is fun," both teams pull something reasonably edible together.
While Mady rules her subjects with patience like the Queen of Hearts from Alice In Wonderland, Cara proves to be more like a Montessori teacher. In the end, surprisingly, the Queen of Hearts bred more creativity from her subjects.
Mady won the challenge with an avocado chocolate chip cookie and some tunafish salad.
Though the cookie looked horrible, this sacrifice pleased Kate. Everyone agreed, including Cara, that Mady should win.
The true moral of the story? Kate loves to win, and she'd like her children to win too.
Kate Plus 8 airs Tuesdays at 9 p.m. ET on TLC.