It was just another manic week in the life of Rachel Zoe and her team—and you could feel the chaos starting in the opening scene of last night’s Rachel Zoe Project. This week, Rachel had a photo shoot featuring items from Piperlime.com that she styled for Glamour magazine and filmed an episode of Ashton Kutcher’s animated web series The Blah Girls. This stresses Rachel out more than the Oscars and Emmys combined even though the opportunity sounds super fun and super easy. But, Rachel does admit that “the simplest things are actually much more challenging for me.” Even though it sounds like Rachel could use some moral support at the meeting about the Blah Girls that she’ll be taking with Ashton himself—Brad is not allowed to come because his crush on Ashton is so massive that he wouldn’t be able to control himself and possibly maul Ashton right then and there. Taylor, as always, was way too busy actually doing work to attend. So, while Rachel meets with Ashton and his team (alone) about her prom themed Blah Girls episode (Rachel will style the girls’ dresses), we get a juicy little tidbit about Rachel’s past. She went to six proms! Six! Apparently she had six different boyfriends from six different schools . . .and wore six different dresses!
However, even though Taylor loves to complain that she’s the only one that actually takes her job seriously—we finally see her goofing off while on the clock. She joins Brad in mocking Rachel while she’s on a business call. They admit that they are like Rachel’s children and love to antagonize her. Rachel admits that she gets “no respect” and that’s “pretty effed up.” We have to agree—one of these days Rachel is going to show up to work, find her keys to the studio no longer work and peek inside to see Brad and Taylor taking over. Just minutes later, however, Taylor is back to her regularly scheduled cranky self as she, Rachel and Brad start going through all the boxes of clothing from Piperlime. Taylor wants to stay focused and can’t stand that Rachel and Brad want to try everything on.
Next thing we know, it’s time for Rachel to shoot her Blah Girls webisode and she’s confused before they even get started about which girl gets which dress. They get that straightened out but then Rachel just doesn’t understand the concept of animation and green screens and winging it without a script. All she has to do is be herself but that’s just really hard for her. “Fashion I get – animation not so much,” Rachel says to the camera. After the “acting” portion of things—it’s time to record some voiceovers. All Rachel has to say is “what?” and “shut up—right now” and “Oh My G-d – that’s bananas” and “Oh My G-d – I die” She basically just had to say her entire vocabulary but it was really hard for her to “act” even though the direction was to say it like she would in real life.
Next we enter the “Rachel’s life is super crazy, woe is me” part of the episode. As she’s driving back to her studio, her phone starts exploding with calls with everyone demanding her attention. Next thing we know, we’re finally at the Glamour shoot and shocker, Taylor is complaining. She just doesn’t feel mentally stimulated with her current job and complains how hard shoots are because she has to keep Rachel on track. She just wishes she had more creative control. Don’t we all, Taylor? Don’t we all . . .
While Rachel drives the Glamour editors crazy with her opinions on the models hair and make-up and her desire to make them “cooler”—Taylor has a phone conversation that sets her over the edge. Apparently while Taylor’s working her butt off at this most mentally unstimulating photo shoot—Brad was having a leisurely afternoon getting his dog groomed.
To be honest, we’re not really sure why Taylor is always stressed, Rachel is always frazzled and Brad just seems to be hanging out and trying on clothes? What exactly is his job? When it comes to clothes, we’re not 100 percent sure, but when it comes to Rachel—Brad is absolutely her confidant. When they’re back at the studio, Rachel gets word that her Blah Girls episode is ready for viewing. She confides in Brad that the shoot was “embarrassing and hard” and that it was particularly hard to “talk to invisible people.” She then wonders how Cameron (that’s Diaz in case you didn’t hear Rachel mention that she was her client about a billion times) did it with Shrek because “animation is hard.”
Ashton calls to see how Rachel liked her webisode but once Rachel and Brad find out that he’s calling from Atlanta—all they care about it whether or not they have spotted any Real Housewives like Kim or NeNe. You know what was the most fascinating part of that conversation? That Demi and Ashton actually watch the show (and no, they hadn’t had any spottings—yet).
Moving on—Taylor confides to a friend over lunch that even though she’s an associate at the company that she feels like a “glorified assistant.” She also said that Rachel made promises about having Taylor involved with her line of clothing, bags and jewelry that she hadn’t kept. I’m not sure if Taylor is aware of this or not—but Rachel hasn’t launched anything yet! She decides right then and there that she needs to talk to Rachel about her future and makes a truly shocking statement. “I can be one who complains or do something about it . . . “ she says. Is our little Taylor growing up?
But, Taylor’s big moment of showing some professional maturity was foiled when she arrived at the studio to talk to Rachel and found Rachel was a hot mess of sickness. Rachel wouldn’t let anyone call the doctor because she “hates hospitals” but could “throw up all over Taylor” because she was “literally that naseous and debilitated.” Brad and Taylor start getting really worried and beg Rachel to get better because the thought of her dying is too much for them to bear—they would have to style all her clients on their own for the funeral!
Rachel finally agrees to let Taylor drive her home. Rachel is freaking because she has never come home early from work in her life—and this must be really serious since she has a 95.9 degree temperature. Rachel changes into a dramatic, white, terry cloth robe while Taylor keeps a vigil by her bedside. An annoyed Taylor asks Rachel, “you’re not going to die, right?” And Rachel solemnly tells Taylor that she is “her blessed jewel” (whatever that means) and if she had kids, she would leave them to Taylor. So wait, does that mean Rachel believes she is going to die? Will she leave her company to Taylor? Will Brad get a chance to say good-bye? Sadly, the episode ended with a dramatic “to be continued” flashing at the bottom of the screen so we’ll just have to wait till next week to see if the Rachel Zoe empire lives on!