Britney Seeks Divine Wisdom from Mel

'OK, FIRST GET REAL DRUNK, THEN DRIVE, THEN HATE ON JEWS' Spears, Gibson (inset) (Photo: Getty Images) • Jesus Christ!: Mom-of-the-year Britney Spears and her father are flying to Costa Rica to spend a nice, quiet weekend with Jew-hating drunk Mel Gibson. Was Tom Cruise unavailable?

• Follow the money: Fortune 500 CEOs love Hillary Clinton—and other business jerk political spending habits, via Forbes. (Related: highest paid CEOs.)

• GOPstopper: Finally, a six-step guide to saving the Republican party, including simple directions like "Cut the crap" and "Get a clue." You tell 'em, Politico!

• Junk art: With 260 penises from 90 different animal species mounted on walls and floating in jars of formaldehyde, Icelandic collector Sigurdur Hjartarson's [expletive] museum is almost complete. Damien Hirst kicks himself.

• Special Olympian?: After appealing his ban from the Olympic games because of "unfair advantage," South African bionic-sprinting star Oscar Pistorius (aka "Bladerunner," because he has springy carbon paddles instead of feet) will find out tomorrow if he's going to be allowed to kick some abled [expletive] this summer.

• Blowing it at work: A British woman banks $10,000 in a settlement after her boss farted on her.