TOP BILLING Meester

Sure, we know that Gossip Girl frenemies Serena and Blair are, you know, “fictional characters,” but it’s nonetheless amusing to imagine them duking it out for Queen Bee status in the real world. Now our warped wishes have been granted, thanks to Nylon magazine. Blake Lively and Leighton Meester are each featured as alternate cover girls for the magazine’s May issue, which is accompanied by a fawning profile comparing the show to the works of Edith Wharton, F. Scott Fitzgerald, Truman Capote, and Pierre Choderlos de Laclos.

Literary chops aside, we’re gunning for bitchy brunette Blair to sell more issues. Though Lively is purportedly the star of the show, it’s increasingly Meester who’s scoring headlines and paparazzi attention. And, according to show creator Josh Schwartz, Meester’s role has also enlarged as the season has worn on due to her badass tragi-comic performances. If she’s as big a hit at the newsstand, maybe Serena should get the message and skulk back to her bland New England boarding school.