One year ago, Madison Holleran, a student at the University of Pennsylvania, jumped to her death from a Philadelphia parking garage, leaving behind a note and gifts for members of her family.
This week, the parents of the popular track star, 19, shared her heartbreaking suicide note.
"I thought how unpleasant it was to be locked out, and I thought how it is worse perhaps to be locked in," Holleran shared in her note. The young woman left behind cookies for her grandparents, chocolate for her father and necklaces for her mother.
Madison’s father, Jim Holleran, cherishes his daughter’s memory, recalling: "During the funeral, a guy from the town came and said, 'Jim, if I were to tell you, I'm God and I'm going to give you a daughter for 19 years but I will take her back, will you take this deal?'"
"And I said, you just told me about Madison. So I would say yes. She gave me 19 phenomenal years," he said.
Mr. Holleran said that Madison had told her parents in December 2013 that she was feeling suicidal and was seeing a therapist.
"I was shocked," said her mother Stacy. "She's never been depressed before. I knew she needed a therapist, but I couldn't get her an appointment because it was the weekend. On Sunday I had a friend come over who works in the mental health field.'
Madison seemed to get better over her holiday break, enjoying her time off with friends and family. But when she returned to school in early 2014, things regressed.
An hour before she jumped, Madison posted an image of Rittenhouse Square to her Instagram account.
Madison ended her suicide note with a poignant apology, saying; "I love you all…I’m sorry. I love you."