CHEWY IN CHAINS 'Bacca • Where's your Force now, Wookiee? : Police have arrested a 44-year-old man dressed as Chewbacca outside of Grauman's Chinese Theatre for head-butting a tour guide.
• Orlando pols hit homeless across the face with costumed paw: Not content banning homeless folks from the city's central park, leaders of the "Happiest Place on Earth" have determined that it should be illegal to feed the homeless, too.
• Milk, sugar, and two shots of boobs: In an attempt to stand out, some Seattle coffee shops are turning into "Sexpresso" shops with scantily clad baristas (bra-istas?) and customers looking for a pick-me-up caffeine can't provide.
• How the mighty have fallen: Actor Ryan O'Neal, best known for his roles in 1970's Love Story and Malibu's Most Wanted, has been arrested for assaulting his grown son with a gun.
• Top Republican candidate?: The Democrat's worst nightmare, Ralph Nader, just might roll his old bones out on the '08 campaign trail.