GET OUT! Closet-opener Banks
• Titillating Tyra: A former "supermodel" is going to come out as a lesbian on the Tyra Banks talk show tonight. No word on how "super" the model really is yet. But you'd think a super supermodel would come out on Oprah or a Barbara Walters Primetime Special, not Tyra Banks's show.
• Fashion fish in a barrel: For the 47th time, the mother of all fashion bitches, Mr. Blackwell, has come out with his annual worst dressed list. Topping the 2006 roster are "Screamgirls" Britney Spears and Paris Hilton, followed by "The Duchess of Dowdy" Camilla Parker-Bowles, "from adorable to deplorable" Lindsay Lohan, and "all crass, no class" Christina Aguilera.
• Ford says butch up: What's the biggest faux pas men are guilty of committing, according to model citizen Tom Ford? "They let their wives dress them. In doing that they are denying their ability to express themselves through clothes." It's the holy truth.
• Anorexcessorize!: As if Oksana Onopka's miniscule thighs don't make everyone feel fat enough, Net-a-porter's 2007 fashion resolutions finish the job. According to them (and all the new spring fashion magazines), the mini is going to be "so big for Spring" that designer skirts and dresses will come equipped with an elliptical machine and a personal trainer.