Beating Back the Hordes at Paris Launch

CAUSES CONGESTION Hilton

• They love her: Police are called in and a lane of traffic is closed to handle the teeming throngs at the launch of Paris Hilton's clothing line at haute L.A. boutique Kitson.

• : When not routing out global terrorism, members of the CIA and FBI are editing the Wikipedia pages of subjects like Guantánamo prison and the Iraq War.

• Heroin induced vacation: A week after being hospitalized for "severe exhausting," a skeleton like Amy Winehouse cancels her next month of shows to deal with "health issues" (code for heroin addiction."

• Rubble trouble: Three people are killed and six injured when rubble collapses on rescue workers trying reach the six trapped Utah miners.