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BREAKING NEWS

Osama Driver Gets Bagged!

Oct. 27 2008, Published 7:07 a.m. ET

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  • The war on terror is totally going our way this week! ("Our" is the right way.) Now Salim Hamdan, Osama bin Laden's driver, is the first citizen of Guantanamo to be convicted by the U.S.! Rather embarrassingly, they couldn't pop him as an al-Qaeda conspirer. Probably because he was busy DRIVING. Instead they got him for "providing material support for terrorism," even after he was gracious enough to cough up every little thing he knew from, you know, DRIVING THE ObL-MOBILE. He has been an unwilling resident of Cuba since 2002. He will be sentenced today, but you know, after six years in Gitmo, how bad could it be?

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