Miley Cyrus, How Could You?

A STATISTIC Cyrus • Crossing the Federline: We are outraged! Barely 16-year-old Miley Cyrus, don't you dare. Put down that skeevy 22-year old back-up dancer!

• A job well done: Author and longtime Deadspin captain Will Leitch has announced the end of his lengthy editorship of the site. Next stop, at the end of June, New York magazine.

• Foul four-letter word: John McCain ... the guy hates when Barack Obama calls him nasty names. Especially "Bush."

• An easy cell: Alltel rolls over and takes Verizon's $6 billion offer.

• Spiderdork: That same old stunt dude takes his global warming message to new heights, scaling the New York Times' new, environmentally savvy building.

• Locker room chat: Ex-Sports Illustrated columnist Rick Reilly pens his first piece for ESPN the Magazine, opens up about his alcoholic father.