Congratulations to Michael Phelps, who, as the whole world knows, won his record 8th gold medal on Saturday evening. Here he is chatting with Matt Lauer on this morning's Today Show. For seven minutes. But what the hell, America can't get enough, right? If this is your sort of thing, enjoy. Us, we'll be busy feeling sorry for the other Olympians, the ones who will return to a life of normalcy and underemployment. Unless they wind up appearing on reality TV, which, given the way of the world now, is more than likely.