Memo to Mahmoud: Iran is Totally Gay

at Columbia University in New York, Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad answered gay rights questions by claiming, essentially, that Iran doesn't have gays. "In Iran we don't have homosexuals like in your country. We do not have this phenomenon," the fun-size leader said. "I don't know who told you that we have it."

No one told us, Mr. Ahmadinejad. Iran is out, proud, and loud. Below, tell-tale signs of gay Iran.

• Iranian dance instructor (above)

• Tehran is the "sex-change capital of the world"

• The flagrant geographic gayness of the Strait of Hormuz

• These Iranian men's hairstyles