What'd we miss today? Hopefully, the same things you did, because that's what you're going to get. Now then:
• The Dow dropped 500 points.
• The Pope said God wants you to suffer.
• There was love in the ruins at Lehman Brothers.
• Pink Floyd keyboardist Richard Wright booked that great gig in the sky.
• Noted canning expert Damien Hirst was expected to do very well from his auction of preserves.
• We ran desperately short on time and tried to bulk out this feature with items that looked like they went somewhere but in fact were just frauds.
• Someone was actually still obsessed with Leigh Lezark.