Here Are Some Stories We Missed Today!

THIS DOESN'T FEEL CATHARTIC Clinton, Obama (Photo: Getty Images) • A purely symbolic gesture: Barack Obama has approved Hillary Clinton's dubious campaign to put herself up for nomination at the upcoming Democratic National Convention. We have to ask: Is it because she's a woman or just power-hungry?

• Not a mother-abuser, after all: The UK's Crown Prosecution Service won't be charging Christian Bale over complaints of assault at a British hotel. But, hey, he's not looking to be knighted or anything.

• Wish you were Communist now?: China is in the lead for this year's Olympic gold medals, winning 22 to the United States' paltry 10. Now please take us off the banned websites list?

• Newspapers run out of people to lay off: Gannett, owner of USA Today, is cutting 1,000 jobs; McClatchy is freezing wages; the Austin American-Statesman is up for sale; and the Tribune Company has liquidated 29 percent of its assets. That Jefferson quote about the security of a free press is starting to look really quaint.

• Not another corporate holiday: Get ready, ABC has declared September 21 the start of National Stay at Home Week! It's also when new shows start, but this is totally about saving the environment.