A Gay Without a Mexican

TAIL AND TWO CITIES Represent! Coke vs. Pepsi. Kennedy vs. Castro. Heidi vs. L.C. Epic yet minor rifts when compared to the timeless power struggle between New York and Los Angeles. In the name of settling this battle royale, each week RadarOnline.com will take stock and determine which city truly holds the competitive edge.

After a short hiatus, the Hills has returned to MTV. And with the return of America's best fake reality show about fashion interns ever, so returns our enthusiasm for a little conceit called NYC vs. L.A. This week: Spitzer's melancholy whores dominate the NYC tabs, and the O.C. bids farewell to its favorite self-loathing Mexican.

NYC: Like a phoenix from the ashes, blogger and NYC narcissist-about-town before-it-was-cool-to-be-a- narcissist-about-town Stephanie Klein reemerges with a new book, reminding us all that, prior to winning our hearts with her particular brand of self-absorption, she used to be fat.

L.A.: Gustavo Arellano, alternative-weekly columnist and prominent Mexican, signs off with his last "Ask a Mexican" column ever. One of his final issues to solve: Why are gay Mexican men so ... como se dice ... unreliable? His response: "Queer: Maybe your flaky Mexican papis chulos just don't think you're their cup of horchata and are too kind to tell you in person."