PUPPY LOVER Tancredo, Dog (inset)
Criminal charges in Mexico against Duane "Dog" Chapman—for illegally bounty hunting American serial rapist Andrew Luster—were dropped today, and no one seems more pleased than congressman and Republican presidential candidate Tom "Must Love Dog" Tancredo.
Long a supporter of Dog's case, the probably not-president immediately released a statement: "Prayers from a lot of people have been answered with the decision not to go ahead with the prosecution.... Now the Dog can focus all of his energy on doing what he does best—bringing in the bad guys." Mexican officials had threatened extradition and a criminal trial, where Chapman could have faced up to four years in a dank Mexican jail. Today he was dismissed on an expiration of the statute of limitations.
The Dog's day comes just a week after Tancredo successfully passed his proposed House amendment to free former border patrol agents Ignacio Ramos and Jose Compean. Tancredo, who is best known for his controversial comments about the deportation and general threat of illegal immigrants, reemphasized his support of America's favorite bounty hunter. "As I've often said, the government of Mexico should give him a medal for removing such a degenerate criminal from the midst of their society."
Clearly, Tancredo owns Dog's case in terms of presidential platforms and considers this a victory. While he was quick on the story, others have faltered—no less than 10 additional presidential campaigns were contacted for comment, but nary a one offered an official stance on the Bounty Hunter's case.