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Columbia Devastated By Hurricane ObamaCain!

Oct. 27 2008, Published 7:07 a.m. ET

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Today in the first world and the third and definitely between the two:

• WHY IS GOD ABOUT TO DESTROY HOUSTON? Why have you angered him?????

• Meanwhile! This is how you don't pick up models.

• Everything's all better in Zimbabwe, now that the president of South Africa has worked out a power-sharing deal between the dual heads of government, at least one of whom is crazy! (You can read more about the fiscal crisis of Zimbabwe here!

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• Now all your Columbia are belong to all candidates! And USHER IS THERE!

• Do not ask strangers on the Internet for help.

• And, in closing? "Sarah Palin is future shock personified."

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