Britney is the New Mary Magdalene

HELLO, GOD? IT'S ME Britney(Photo: Getty Images)

Riddled with a rep for bad driving, worse parenting, and generally insane behavior, Britney Spears might have landed herself the king of publicists: God. At least that's the hope of the Hollywood Prayer Network, a group of 5,000 Jesus-loving Christians who have taken it upon themselves to pray for wayward celebrities who can't seem to help themselves.

"We tell people, 'If you're angry at a TV show or you're switching channels because of content, stop and pray for the people on the show,'" says Karen Covell, HPN's founder, who also urges members to pray for actors who seem "lonely" or have had a string of box office flops. At the top of the group's prayer list these days is Spears, whose recent display of rash behavior might actually leave her beyond the scope of even divine intervention. The group's favorite target used to be Valtrex-popping purported Bible reader Paris Hilton. But God, too, has had his fill of Hilton, apparently.

Spears, for her part, seems to be getting support from Christians the country over: Members of a Kentucky megachurch are sending Spears letters of encouragement at the behest of a pastor who urged them to support Britney "the way Jesus loves her."