Angelina's Baby Scheming Revealed!
Oct. 27 2008, Published 7:07 a.m. ET
FOILED BY MATH Jolie
Jolie speaks! Well, not to the weeklies, but in doctor's office favorite Readers Digest, she talks about life with Daddy Brad-y and their rainbow bunch. And the tabs diligently decode.
The staff of the self-proclaimed tabloid of record, Us Weekly, flex their mathlete muscles, crunching the numbers for this SAT-caliber brain buster: Jolie says bio baby Shiloh was not an accident. Shiloh was born in May 2006, putting her conception date somewhere in late August/early September 2005. Brad's divorce to Jennifer Aniston wasn't official until October 2005. Let's see ... carry the one ... Oh, snap! The final insult! Angelina finally admits she was trying to get knocked-up while Brad was still married! Somewhere deep within Vince Vaughn's meaty arms, Jen is quietly thanking Janice Min's minions for the closure.
Life & Style, which has been industriously breaking Brad and Ange up for weeks, finds an expert to spin Jolie's statements like, "So many parents today do separate," into "I despise Brad so much I can't stand to be on the same continent." Ok!, meanwhile, arranges Angie's statements to make the former smack-shooting, Billy-Bob-blood-wearing actress into mother of the year. And God bless Star magazine! While they mention the Reader's Digest interview, the focus is on the claims of another publication, Australia's New Idea, where some fashion insider claims Brangelina had the world's hottest threesome with a Victoria's Secret model. Digest that!
- Tragic One Direction Singer Liam Payne Dead Aged 31 After 130Ft Balcony Plunge: Celeb Tributes Pour In as Images Emerge of Smashed Up Hotel Room Strewn With White Powder and 'Drugs Foil'
- Family of Menendez Brothers Beg for Convicted Killers' Freedom in Press Conference Three Decades After Brutal Murders: 'They Were Failed By Their Parents!'
- BREAKING: Jailed 'Sex Beast' Sean 'Diddy' Combs Hit With Another Wave of Horrific Lawsuits — Rapper Accused of Drugging, Raping, Sodomizing and Threatening to Murder Multiple New Victims
DAILY. BREAKING. CELEBRITY NEWS. ALL FREE.
Photo: Splash News & Picture Agency