Yeah, it’s a smash with $140 at the domestic box office in its first five days. And the special effects are state of the art. And the two stars have charisma.
But what about the plot? There are enough holes for the Green Goblin to fly through. Check out our top ten list of things that don’t make sense or are just plain dumb (after first heeding our Spoiler Alert!):
9. Speaking of security, there’s a room full of radioactive spiders whose bite can turn someone into a Spider-Man. So how does Peter Parker get in? He copies someone’s simple finger movements on a security pad. Okay, even if that were believable — there are no video security cameras inside or outside the lab? Anywhere? C’mon!
8. When Peter discovers his powers, he breaks the faucet in his bathroom sink. It never gets fixed. Shouldn’t the house have flooded?
7. Formerly bookwormy, non-atheltic, easy-to-beat-up Peter suddenly Spidey-leaps up and smashes a basketball backboard, and busts up a goal post with a casual football toss. And no one thinks this is maybe a little strange??
6. Peter sees a video clip about Oscorp’s new steel-strength silly string, and, a moment later, he has a seemingly unlimited supply of the top-secret stuff. When? How? Wha??
5. The Lizard attacks New York and Peter, who is half-a-city away, picks him up with his Spidey Sense. Later in the movie, the Lizard is hiding right behind a wall and Spidey can’t sense him! Oh yeah: and Doc Connors starts to turn into the Lizard, all scaly and stuff, while Peter is right there! And he still doesn’t pick up on it!
4. Peter decides to take pictures of his fight with the Lizard. Fair enough. But he doesn’t think to pull off the sticker that says PROPERTY OF PETER PARKER on the camera…so the Lizard knows just who to hunt down! And he doesn’t bother webbing it too take it with him when he leaves. Hey, who was gonna steal the camera in a sewer? The Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles?
3. Spidey can stick to anything, right? The movie makes a big point of that when he sticks to sinks and basketballs. Except, suddenly, at the end, when he can’t stick to a building, and Dr. Connors needs to save him from falling.
2. Spidey got shot. He was crippled. Then he wasn’t. Yeah, maybe he had super Spidey healing power but that’s never mentioned anywhere. Since when can spiders heal themselves? You step on them, they don’t grow eight new legs!
1. The dumbest thing of all: the cops tell Peter that the guy who killed Uncle Ben has a tat on his wrist. How do they know this? The only people who saw the guy are the bodega owner (who was looking away when his sleeve got pulled back); Peter, who was in another part of the store; and Uncle Ben, who’s dead (after stupidly pulling a gun into his own chest so he could be shot by a guy who hasn’t shot anyone).
We haven’t even bothered to mention that Spider-Man is unmasked at least four times, in public places where one guy even warns him, “I’ll remember your face!”, yet nothing comes of it. Or Gwen having to evacuate an office tower at night time — when, as New Yorkers, we can assure you that not a lot of people are working in office towers.