Tammi Baliszewski, who was involved in a relationship with Kelsey Grammer before he dumped her for his now ex-wife, Camille, tells RadarOnline.com exclusively that people are only now just seeing the Emmy Award winning actor for who he really is.
“The public is starting to understand this individual,” said Baliszewski, who was engaged Grammer in 1994 but never made it to the altar.
Ironically, Tammi says that watching Camille’s pain over discovering Kelsey’s affair and the break-up of their marriage, played out on reality TV, only brought back memories of her own abrupt breakup in 1995 when she has claimed she found out Kelsey was two-timing her — with Camille!
“It’s very harsh, very cruel, he doesn’t have compassion for other people’s stories; he has compassion for himself and his story,” she said of how the Frasier star acted towards Camille, who stars in The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills.
“He didn’t have compassion for me when he walked away and didn’t tell me what was going on and it doesn’t seem like he has compassion at all for Camille how he’s handling this. He wants what he wants.”
Although she admits she hasn’t spoken with the 56-year-old actor in 14 years, she says old habits die hard.
“There seems to be certain patterns that continue to be kind of just repeating themselves.
“Past behaviors are usually the best predictor for future behavior and it seems that he’s got a pattern.”
Baliszewski, who says she has a double Ph.D. and is a spiritual counselor, wrote a book following her split with Kelsey and told RadarOnline.com that she gave Camille a copy.
Kelsey has a long history of failed relationships. He married first wife Doreen Alderman from 1982-1990 and had a daughter, Spencer.
Shortly after, he had another daughter, Kandace, with girlfriend Barrie Buckner, and in 1992 was briefly married to stripper Leigh-Anne Csuhany, who suffered a miscarriage.
Baliszewski and Kelsey were engaged in 1994 and split two years later. And in 1997, he wed Playboy model Camille and had two children over their 14-year marriage.
“I think he’s like a lot of people in that they think they have to have someone outside of them loving them for them to feel love,” Baliszewski said. “They don’t have an internal reference point for self love…he’s not on solid ground within himself.
“Somebody has to want to change and I don’t see that he does, he can’t be alone.”
Kelsey is now engaged to British flight attendant Kayte Walsh, who’s 26 years his junior.
“Possibly he’s emotionally that’s his age range,” Baliszewski opined.
“I don’t know, maybe I outgrew him,” she said with a laugh.
But she does believe that despite his actions, his intentions are true.
“I think he’s just trying to be happy, I think he’s looking for love like most people,” she said. “But like most people they look for it outside themselves and he’s trying to I think manifest love from the outside in, which is opposite from my book Manifesting Love.
“Because he treated me the way he did it kind of bought me to my knees and I had to learn to do things very different and I took that time to heal and I do think Camille is doing that.”
After learning of Camille’s new gig as CNN’s host for the Oscars red carpet, Baliszewski thinks she is on the right path.
“I think she’s getting to be center stage in her own life. She’s getting to be the star in her own life and that’s always a good thing when somebody is the most important person.
“Healthy relationships are about making God first and themselves second and then considering others third. Not to the narcissistic degree that Kelsey does — with absolute disregard for anybody else’s reality.
“I think [Camille's] a lovely person and I think she’s going to be just fine.”
And what Camille is doing in her career is exactly the advice Baliszewski would give the future Mrs Grammer, Kayte.
“Trust your gut. Trust your intuition. Trust your instincts. Be a priority in your own life.”