We have nothing funny to say about Heath Ledger’s death. He’s our all-time favorite gay cowboy/suicidal prison guard/Grimm brother, and the whole situation’s just sad. Sad, too, for the weekly warriors, given that the Brokeback actor’s death came on a Tuesday afternoon—the dreaded window between the mags’ closing on Monday night and newsstand delivery on Wednesday morning, a time when celebrity hijinx must be pushed back until the next issue. So the glossies stick with the trusty Spears sister act—and it’s increasingly clear that the tabs are quite ready for their likely demise.
Life & Style seems to want Brit baby sis Jamie Lynn to miscarry, while Star has the 16-year-old TV-star giving her baby up for adoption, Juno-style. Well, it turns out there’s not much to those miscarriage rumors, other than the bounty of docs who tell L&S that if Jamie Lynn were to drink, smoke, and carouse, she might miscarry. And as for adoption, it’s more like J-Lynn is just gonna let mamma Lynne babysit—like a lot. And with her at the helm, what could go wrong?