• Word wars: Hip-hop mogul Russell Simmons is seeking to eliminate the B-word, the H-word, and the N-word from the recording industry, calling them “extreme curse words.” Presumably the C-word, the F-word, and the K-word word are still permissible.
• Dennis the menace: In an attempt to steal some media attention from the front of the pack, diminutive Dem. Dennis Kucinich announces his plans to introduce articles of impeachment against Dick Cheney.
• Show your stripes: Titty tycoon Joe Francis will be spending the next 35 days in jail.
• Author passes: Seventy-three-year-old Pulitzer Prize-winning writer David Halberstam was killed in a car crash last night.
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