DITCH DIGGER Giuliani

• On unstable Ground Zero: Rudy continues to stumble over earlier comments, in which he placed himself at the site of the World Trade Center more often than the disaster’s field workers.

• Sucker!: Despite Colombian drug lord Carlos “Chupeta” (lollipop) Ramirez Abdia‘s appearance-altering plastic surgery and his various aliases, police still manage to catch him by identifying his voice.

• No, no, no?: Amy Winehouse does not go to rehab, and is instead staying in a London hotel, reports NME.

• Peep show: Despite her third nipple and persona non grata status in the U.S., Lily Allen may get her own BBC TV show.