Miraculously, today is Friday. Here are your starters:

• So apparently Alaska Governor Sarah Palin is going on Saturday Night Live this weekend. Frankly, we’re sick of wondering.
• Germany’s getting a similarly priced bank bailout.
• The Washington Post has endorsed Barack Obama.
• There’s some big sloppy mess involving Prince Harry, Paris Hilton, and Christina Aguilera that we don’t understand and don’t care to. He snubbed one and was flirting with another “outrageously”?
• Confirmed: Glenn Beck is ditching CNN for Fox News.
• Microsoft and Yahoo are still fumbling about, not deciding on whether to partner up or not. And to great effect!
• As usual, though, it’s not quite like Google’s bounce.
• Madonna = psycho vampire.