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O.J. Flips the Script For A Second Book Pitch

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SOPHOMORE EFFORT Simpson

If he did it … again: Not content to drag down just one publishing giant, The Juice Simpson is laying a trap for the next sucker, shopping a second book—this time, it’s about the life of the banshee-like Nicole Brown Simpson.

Grave condition: After at least three failed operations, ailing dictator Fidel Castro is in bad shape and may kick the communal bucket very soon. His brother has been in charge of Cuba ever since the off-balance comrade fell ill in July.

Oscar’s tacky brother: How do you know when an awards show is a joke? When Martin Scorsese wins (and coincidentally looks more and more like Woody Allen each day), Babel and Dreamgirls take home the top awards, and a Borat-less Sacha Baron Cohen grabs a tacky Golden Globe of his own and thanks his co-star’s stale ‘taint air for his very existence.

Promise keeper: The only Republican vegetarian in the world, Sen. Wayne Allard of Colorado, will not run for re-election next year, setting the Dems up to pad a congressional majority that currently rests upon the health of bedridden-but-stable Sen. Tim Johnson of South Dakota.

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