ARNOLD: LEADER OF THE BROKE He’s the Governor! (Photo: Detail, Annie Leibovitz)

So the great state of California, composed of the northernmost part of Mexico, the independent gay nation of San Francisco which is adjacent to Googleland, and then some places where they grow awesome weed, unsurprisingly lives paycheck to paycheck just like your drunk brother. It depends on many short-term loans to like pay its housecleaners and stuff. So, in our loan-unfriendly climate, it is reduced to begging to the federal government maybe for as much as $7 billion. Now, California is this kind of guy—every year it borrows massive amounts of money from the federal government to get kick-started. Yet somehow it never quite gets it together what with all the Christmas spending for each year. Now suddenly it needs $3 billion to pay their schools in a couple weeks and no one will loan them any money. Goodbye, California!