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Dick Cheney on ‘Cousin Barack’

ALL IN THE FAMILY Cheney (Photo: Getty Images)

Thanksgiving dinner plans?: Cheney says he and Barack haven’t yet bonded over their cousinship: “I didn’t know whether that would help him or hurt him, so I thought I’d probably stay away from him.”

Return of the Butterscotch Stallion: Owen Wilson talks Darjeeling Limited with Wes Anderson in a Myspace interview, his first post-suicide.

Royal ruckus: An unidentified royal is targeted by blackmailers demanding $100,000 to keep quiet about an alleged gay sex and cocaine-snorting cell-phone video. Though tempting to speculate, it is well known that Harry likes boobs.

Hil-arious accusations: Barack cranks up the critical rhetoric, slamming Hillary’s approach to the tough questions: “You should hedge, dodge, and spin, but at all costs, don’t answer.”

Lout of Africa: Oprah tearfully apologizes to her South African girls’ school for appointing a matron who allegedly abused students.

Different Hillarys, different outcomes: The Argentine answer to Hillary Clinton, Cristina Kirchner, outlasts 13 rivals in this weekend’s presidential election, replacing her husband in the nation’s top post. The Hillarys of Oman fare slightly less well—all 21 women fail to win advisory council seats.