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Hills’ Conrad’s No Catch

NO SWEET TREAT Conrad(Photo: Getty Images)

Hills trollop’s fake date: Lauren Conrad date victim describes her as a Red Bull-swilling, ice-cream deprived conversation killer. Also, The Hills is pretend.

Misappropriating Miss Manners: Her Southern hospitality affronted, an etiquette coach in Alabama is suing Sacha Baron Cohen for duping her into looking at penis pictures to make more funny his film.

Continence challenged: Public urinator Mike Gravel trods out old 1984/American airport comparison before calling TSA employees “intellectually challenged.”

Bollywood’s bad-boy begs for bail: Two-time Filmfare Awards winner and former drug addict Sanjay Dutt sought bail today in New Delhi, where he was convicted on terrorism charges based on what he now claims was a false confession.

Price of admission gets out of control: In the most icky product tie-in of all time, fans of the Saw movie franchise are joining the nationwide Red Cross “Give ‘Til it Hurts” blood drive hoping to collect 60,000 pints this year.

NME DOA? Rumors are swirling in the UK about the demise of the print version of 55-year-old alternative music mag NME, according to English newsletter PopBitch. Only nme.com would remain, as the rumblings go.