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Britney’s Back, Battling Over Babies

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YES, WE USED THIS PICTURE LAST TIME We’re lazy. Deal with it.

Reunited: Britney Spears was back in court today for a child custody hearing, and apparently she dragged her old lawyer Laura Wasser along.

Battle of the sexism: House Speaker Nancy Pelosi says she’s a “victim of sexism,” just like Hillary Clinton was. It goes unsaid, but one of the sexists who supported Clinton’s opponent—who is a man—was House Speaker Nancy Pelosi.

Haters: Amanda Knox, the American exchange student accused of murdering her roommate, says she stands condemned because she’s pretty. Nobody cares about ugly murderers, duh.

No word on the breed yet: What do you do when you disagree with your neighbor about the breed of his dog? Shoot him with a crossbow, according to this Nebraska curmudgeon.

“King of Bling” behind bars: Jacob Arabov, better known as Jacob the Jeweler due to his role in enabling hip-hop materialism, will spend 30 months in federal prison for conspiring to launder illegal drug profits for the “Black Mafia.”

Poor boy: After being denied a U.S. visa due to an upcoming trial in London, it seems that Boy George won’t be giving his planned concert for New York’s Strongest.

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