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“Anonymous” to Wish L. Ron Hubbard a Very Happy Birthday

Members of “Anonymous”, the loveably kooky band of web-savy anti-Scientology mavens, have quite the birthday present lined up for dead church founder L. Ron Hubbard, whose myriad contributions to the world of legitimate religious discourse are being honored by the church next Saturday in a Washington, DC, hotel: they are throwing a rival party in the same building!

“We regret to inform you that due to time constraints, we are forced to hold the convention in the same building as Church of Scientology’s L. Ron Hubbard Birthday Celebration for members of the entire central east coast of the United States,” notes a tongue-in-cheek Anonymous press release. Attendees are told to be on their best behavior while hanging upstairs of the real Scientologists in the Wardman Park Marriott—”no bullbaiting scilons or infiltrating their celebration”—since their “mere presence will drive them batshit insane.” Unfortunately, no food is allowed in the hotel conference room, but Anons should feel free to “eat downstairs in the restaurants by the salons instead to freak the scilons.” Donations to help cover the cost of the room (and, we bet, to cover the cost of booze; something tells us these dudes get down) are welcome!

A similar protest of Hubbard’s birthday will be held in New York City this Saturday, the 15th, across from the Times Square Church of Scientology on W. 46th Street. Video invite to the DC event, complete with menacing soundtrack and robotic voice-over, is above.

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