'Nervous' Lydia McLaughlin Spills 'RHOC' Season 12 Reunion Secrets

Jul. 25 2017, Updated 10:10 a.m. ET

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Lydia McLaughlin already revealed major RHOC secrets this season, and now she exclusively told RadarOnline.com everything about the reunion too!

"I hate the reunion!" she confessed to Radar. "It is a hard day of work and it is scary and terrifying."

"All the girls are just there and you have to hold — you know, you're held accountable for all these things that you've said and you have to defend yourself," she explained. "It's just a lot of stress and I like rainbows and butterflies and confetti, so I don't love tearing people to shreds!"

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But, the reunion shows aren't the only episodes McLaughlin is afraid of watching!

"The cameras follow you around every day for four months and you're dealing with a lot of women that are very strong and opinionated, and you're thrown into these situations and sometimes you haven't slept or sometimes you've heard that people have said all of these things and so you're already really riled up," she said. "So there's definitely moments that I wish didn't happen. There are moments I'm nervous to watch and see what I said."

"When you get mad in real life you can resolve it and move forward, but with Housewives it kind of lives on forever and you have to relive it," she added. "So yeah, I'm definitely nervous for several episodes!"

McLaughlin, 37, returned to RHOC after her one season appearance in season 8.

In her time away from the show, she welcomed another son with husband Doug McLaughlin, 37, and renewed her vows off-screen.

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