THE REAL HOUSEWIVES OF NEW JERSEY: THE LOST FOOTAGE RECAP

Anyone else just as disappointed as we were by last night’s The Real Housewives of New Jersey “Lost Footage” special on Bravo? We were expecting more table flipping, way more Danielle drama and lots more excitement over at the Brownstone. Did Bravo—gasp—show all the good stuff already? If you never watched the show before, this looked like Theresa, Caroline, Dina, Jacqueline and Danielle were just your typical, average boring housewives. We know that’s not true! But, in case you missed it, here are the new things we learned about our favorite Joisy girls:

Theresa’s daughter Gia refers to herself in the third person. And Theresa still insists she’s not a stage mom . . .

Caroline and her family love to laugh and love to eat. We get it. And her son Albie is hot. We know.

Dina loves watching pig races at the county fair. Oh and she doesn’t want her daughter Lexi to grow up. Somehow, Lexi takes that to mean her mom wants her to become a lesbian.

Jacqueline’s daughter Ashley has figured out that if she asks for money while Jacqueline and her husband Chris are snuggling over a glass of wine after dinner each night—she’ll get it.

Dina’s cat “Grandma Wrinkles” is even weirder and uglier and smells like rotten cheese (Dina’s description—not ours!)

Danielle needs everyone to like her and swears that any rumors her friends hear about her are absolutely not true. The proof is simply because she says so!

Caroline’s son Albie is hot. Did we mention that already?

But wait! Weren’t there hours and hours of footage from that amazing, drama-fueled reunion special? The best they could do was show Theresa freaking out because she heard Danielle and her make-up artist talking sh** about her?  All we can say is those ladies better start stirring the pot for season two because the snoozefest we watched last night just isn’t gonna cut it!