VIDEO RECAP: The Jersey Shore Hookup Lowdown!

It was an R-rated hook up night on MTV’s The Jersey Shore that, of course, included some fisticuffs.

Snooki met a farm fella (and immediately regretted not shagging him), “The Situation” got hot in the hot tub (and cost someone their job), Vinny gave up his sloppy seconds (and was proud of it) and Jwoww got ejected from an Atlantic City club (and later slapped “The Situation” for “causing it”).

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It was a big one hour!

But let’s dissect why Nicole “Snooki” Polizzi has become an instant reality star. Much of it is surely the result of her love life and self-diagnosis of it.

It is for comments, like these, about farmer Keith: “He’s like Irish and he talks like a Cowboy.”

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Or how about: “I always go for the Italians, so it’s weird for me to like him.”

Another Snooki-ism? “But I saw muscles, so I knew he was my type.”

The best, however, was yet to come. After a passionate night, Snooki lamented: “We didn’t have sex, I don’t know why… He has got to be clean.” Clean, as in no diseases. Classy.

Snooki and the clean farmer Keith, does it get any better? Especially considering Snooki’s summary of her past squeezes: “I’ve been with goats.”

We can’t wait to see who is next!

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