Very Bad Toys

Radar looks back at the most dangerous playthings of all time

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CHILD'S PLAY At least Polly Pocket didn't cause gaping flesh wounds

It has not been a good year for toys, and for toy giant Mattel in particular. First, the company recalled 1.5 million of their Sesame Street and Nickelodeon plastic toys, after discovering that the smiling faces of Elmo and the gang contained high levels of toxic lead paint. Then the killjoys at the Consumer Product Safety Commission struck again—18.2 million Polly Pocket and related dolls worldwide were also recalled because their tiny magnets could cause intestinal blockage or perforation if swallowed. Mattel wasn't the only corporation slowly whittling away at America's youth. Earlier this month, Aqua Dots from the Spin Master corporation were recalled when it turned out that, if swallowed, the balls could render kids comatose.

With over 10 million units of toys recalled in the United States in the past year alone, one could assume that we live in dangerous times. But, as anyone who has chucked a lawn dart knows, lethal Sesame Street pals and bowel-ripping Polly Pockets are kids' stuff compared to the hazardous baubles of yesteryear.

In this spirit, Radar presents an updated version of the most dangerous toys of all time—those treasured playthings that drew blood, chewed digits, took out eyes, and, in one case, actually irradiated. To keep things interesting, we excluded BB guns, slingshots, throwing stars, and anything else actually intended to inflict harm. Below, our toy box from hell.




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TRIPPIN' DOTS The rainbow-colored culprits

1. AQUA DOTS
Beloved children's toys of old have oft allowed youngsters to ape questionable adult behavior. (See candy cigarettes and those lovably trampy Bratz dolls) but the most recent addition to pantheon of dangerous toys—Aqua Dots from the Spin Master corporation—took it to the next level. The beads were part of a craft kit that was intended to let children created "multidimensional designs." But when water was added to the plastic balls, the outside coating actually became toxic. The result: Curious tykes who licked the balls enjoyed the effects of date-rape drug GHB, long before their college years. Sure, it sounds cool. But victims of Aqua Dots could become "comatose, develop respiratory depression, or have seizures." The toxic dots, which were labeled as appropriate for kids ages 4 and up, were recalled earlier this month, halting many untoward games of "doctor," but robbing a generation of young artisans the chemical enhancement they so richly deserve.

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