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EXCLUSIVE LEAKED MEMO: Inside Hollywood’s SOS plan for Television

Hollywood is feeling the hard times like anyone else these days. So much so that a powerful talent agency has issued a Jerry Maguire-esque state of the union memo to relieve their client’s anxieties.

The memo in question, obtained by RadarOnline.com from a desk at a certain three-letter agency, addresses the scarcity of decent television roles for working actors- taking no qualms in naming certain celebrities pushing out the average SAG member.

“Due again to a sagging economy, studios and networks believe that by committing named stars to their projects, they will receive more money from this year’s up-fronts from ad agencies,” the memo states.

And which named stars does the document claim are snatching up some plum roles?

“Stars and pop-stars like Richard Dreyfuss, Chevy Chase, Brittany Snow, Elle McPhereson, Rebecca Romijn, [Ashlee] Simpson, Scott Caan, Skeet Ulrich,” the memo says.

It’s not all Ashlee-bashing, however. The agent goes on to list what they consider “proven TV talents” that will possibly push out up and comers come September when fall pilots air. That list includes Kelsey Grammer, Eric McCormick, Jenna Elfman, Maura Tierney and Joel McHale.

So what solution does the agent offer the jilted masses in Rebecca Romijn’s shadow?

“This pilot season may be even more competitive than the concurrent regular TV market right now. So those of you who have gotten auditions for series Regulars feel great about that!!”

We’re sure they’re overjoyed.

(Photo: Splash News)

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