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• From his barstool: Billy Bob Thornton claims former wife Angelina Jolie is going through a “high school phase” by dating “the high school quarterback” (baby daddy Brad Pitt), and warns he doesn’t know if he’ll be there when she’s ready to come around again. Yeah, okay, Bubba, we buy that.
• We’re all together again for the first time: Former Clinton campaign manager Patti Solis Doyle joins Team Obama, where she’ll serve as chief of staff to the vice-presidential nominee, whoever that turns out to be.
• Back to black-out: Lovely loose canon Amy Winehouse fainted, and was rushed to the hospital. She woke up to find a needle in her arm, let out a long sweet sigh, and went back to her happy dreams.
• Who knew?: This Tiger Woods kid is apparently pretty good at the golf.
• Obama brought to book: Former Bush buddy and evangelical Stephen Mansfield pens a book that’s all for Obama. It’s his faith, not his plans for a basketball court in the White House, that impresses Mansfield.
• Hot mess!: Weeds woman Mary-Louise Parker broke her toe on the bed frame while filming a love scene. You could probably make some kind of easy pot joke here, were you so inclined.
• You’re welcome: A gallery of pregnant-looking men, brought to you by TMZ.