• This Bud's pour vous: Belgian-Brazilian beverage behemoth bids big bucks for Anheuser-Busch. Expect plenty of political hand-wringing about the sanctity of our national beverage.

• Oh brother: Simon & Schuster has announced that it will publish a tell-all memoir by Madonna's brother, Christopher Ciccone, next month. Madonna unsure whether to be totally pissed or just grateful for the attention.

• Deal or no deal: London police have charged a man and a woman with dealing drugs to Amy Winehouse. Police first began investigating the case following The Sun's publication of Amy's cracked out video last January.

THERE IS MOST ASSUREDLY MORE: French love songs; Starbucks colonizing; and boozy ladies!

• Bayou Magic: Louisiana wunderkind governor (and potential Republican VP choice) Bobby Jindal can cast out demons.

• Love is the drug: On her new album, due out July 21, French first lady Carla Bruni sings "You are my dope, more lethal than Afghan heroin, more dangerous than Colombian powder." Everyone assumes she's directing that loving ditty at Nicolas Sarkozy, but it could be about any number of the famous dudes she's banged.

• Grande-a-go-go: Since things aren't going so well over here, Starbucks has announced plans to open 150 new locations in European airports and train stations, to suck the charm out of life abroad.

• Just a sip darling: You're heard of the "hourglass," "the apple," and "the pear." Now ladies have a new body shape option: the wineglass figure. And yes, it's for those who like a glass of wine or four.

• Brainwaves: How likely are you to get brain cancer from the crappy cell phone you got for free after signing your life away for another two years? Check its radiation emitting levels here.

• Bad karma request: All those Facebook apps littering all those profile pages aren't just annoying. They could also pose privacy risks.