• Couch joke here: With his Nazi film Valkyrie on hold, Tom Cruise is set to appear on Oprah later this spring (May sweeps!)—the first time he's been on the show since the 2005 coming out party celebrating his insanity.

• Gene labels: The Senate has unanimously passed a proposal banning genetic discrimination. Calling it the "the first new civil rights bill of the new century," Democratic Senator Edward Kennedy said "discrimination based on a person's genetic identity is just as unacceptable as discrimination on the basis of race or religion." Discrimination based on gender and sexuality are still totally up for grabs.

• Good for them: The University of Florida has decided to keep on using tasers, despite the "Don't Tase Me, Bro" incident. The affair might not have resulted in changing university policy, but at least it inspired a song.

WAIT, THERE'S MORE: Wino's really loaded, Hills crew drama, and intervention time for Miley?

• Cause for celebration: Amy Winehouse makes it onto The Times of London's "Young Music Millionaire" list, with an estimated worth of $20 million. Amy, darling, just remember that legal bills can eat that up real quick. (see: Michael Jackson, Britney Spears.)

• Totally harsh conditions: Two production assistants who worked on MTV's The Hills and Next have filed a lawsuit against the network, saying they were not paid for overtime or provided with meal breaks.

• Children are the future: A former Mouseketeer and founder of a child star support group speaks out on the Miley Cyrus quasi-racy pictures non-event, saying, "I fear that since this path has been trodden so many times, that unless someone takes aggressive, active steps with her—I'm talking serious intervention—that we're going to watch yet another meltdown."

• No juice: The Donald seems to want it, but NBC reportedly says no to having O.J. Simpson on Celebrity Apprentice.

• Getting in the ring: Pan's Labyrinth director Guillermo del Toro is slated to direct the film version of The Hobbit, which will serve as a prequel to Peter Jackson's Lord of the Rings trilogy.