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The Idiot Box
Gin and I Dos for Snoop's Curtain Call

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PUPPY LOVE Broadus
Calvin "Snoop Dogg" Broadus has worn many hats since he released his first album, Doggystyle, in 1993: OG, murder suspect, Cadillac pitchman, perennial marijuana smoker, and father. But in last night's season finale of his E! reality show Snoop Dogg's Father Hood we saw the rare and tender side of the game's smoothest criminal, when he renewed his matrimonial vows with his high-school sweetheart, Shante.

Snoop surprised Shante with the ceremony, especially romantic for the Doggfather, who in 2004 filed for divorce, saying in no uncertain terms that he wanted more vagizzle. Though the couple reconciled, judging from the frozen smile on Shante's face for much of the vow renewal ceremony (sealed with several closed-mouth kisses), you wonder if she's not in it simply for the comforts life with Snoop must bring. Not the least of which are three incredible diamond-encrusted rings he gave her, one for each of the couple's children. Pricey? Sure, but you'll remember Snoop also dabbled in porn for a spell, and sex pays.

The best moment of the show, hands down, was when the couple danced to their song, sung by Snoop's "Uncle," Charlie Wilson of the Gap Band. With nary a second thought, Snoop let the tears stream down his face as he held his wife as they both mouthed the words. Now, that's gangsta.

To toast Snoop as he toasted domesticity, Radar compiled a list of our favorite Snoop jokes:

What does Snoop Dogg wash his clothes with?
Blee-och!

Why does Snoop Dogg use an umbrella?
Fo' drizzle.

What does Snoop Dogg put on his salad?
Bacon biaaaahts!

What's the difference between Snoop Dogg and an apple?
Snoop Dogg fucked your teacher!

What does Snoop Dogg use to wash his car?
His hos (Get it? Like hose!)

Why does Snoop Dogg use conditioner?
Fo' tha frizzle, nizzle.

What does Snoop Dogg eat for dinner?
Spa-GHETTOS.

Why does Snoop Dogg love Shirley Temples?
Grenadizzle!

What is Snoop Dogg's favorite tool?
Da' chizzle.

By Lia LoBello   03/06/08 3:20 PM
Related: Fatherhood, Pop, Snoop Dogg, The Idiot Box
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