John Edwards' announcement that he is dropping out of the race for the Democratic nomination has led to plenty of speculation today about who he might endorse, who his supporters will vote for next Tuesday, and a bunch of other stuff some of us find important. But the real question is: What will Johnny do now? Like, for a job?

We've got a few suggestions, John.

Head Back to Wall Street
Edwards does have some experience in private equity and the business world, which he got recruited for on the basis of being a prominent Democrat. As legions of left-leaning lobbyists have learned in the past year, having spent time crapping all over the business community as a politician doesn't mean they won't welcome you into their cash-filled embrace if you can help them.

Do-Goodery
Edwards could go to work for a foundation (the Red Cross is looking) that does some sort of charitable work—or even start his own. His experience in getting people to donate money to lost causes—like, say, his campaign—would serve him as well as his pretty, pretty hair in getting people to part with their cash.

Actual Work
He could make a point of bridging the gap between the two Americas by taking a shitty job like the other half of America—even one that helps the worst of them, like a homeless shelter intake coordinator, public defender, or nonprofit credit counselor. He's not going to, but he could.

Trial Lawyer Redux
All these years of the Bush administration's deregulation and blind-eye-turning policies means there are lots of people Johnny could sue. He's got college tuitions to pay in a couple of years, people.

Government Job
Although plenty of Dems are swooning at John coming on board with Hillary or Barack as VP, he didn't like it that much the last time and probably wouldn't do either of them that much good. On the other hand, as one of a few lawyer-politicians with actual experience in lawyering, his name has been bandied about a lot this week as a potential Democratic Attorney General in either administration. He'd only have to wait about a year to see if he'd actually be nominated, but since he's wealthy, he can afford to take a long vacation like that. Lucky him.