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Patriots Fans Overly Fearful for Tom Brady's Safety

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FANFARE Kennedy, Brady (Photo: Getty Images)
As anyone who has spent any extended time in New England knows all too well, fans of Boston-area sports franchises are some of the most obnoxious individuals you will ever encounter in any capacity in life. This is undoubtedly because most supporters of the Red Sox and Celtics are never able to get over the fact that they were born and bred in a city that is essentially New York's partial-birth kid brother, saddling them with a deep-seated inferiority complex for the rest of their lives (which are mainly spent playing Golden Tee in bars with guys named Sully).

That's the only way to explain the reaction of Patriots fans to the fact that their star metrosexual quarterback Tom Brady has been spending the lead-up to the Super Bowl in New York City, bringing flowers to the West Village townhouse of girlfriend Gisele Bundchen, hanging out at hot spot Butter, and, perhaps most noteworthy, ambling around town in an air cast.

"Brady walking around Manhattan is like Bush walking around downtown Baghdad," says one fan. "I wouldn't put it past some nut-job Giants fans to pull a Tonya Harding," says another. A third complains about Brady being in "enemy territory." A fourth simply screams to a Post reporter, "WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH HIM?" Indeed! Who would ever want to spend a few days going out to expensive dinners with their supermodel Brazilian girlfriend?!

Irrational thought, mind you, is far from the worst Boston fan trait. In 1982, Fenway bleacher dwellers started yelled "Shake! Shake! Shake!" after Minnesota Twins outfielder Jim Eisenreich endured breathing spams and body twitches (he suffered from Tourette's Syndrome). In 2003, New Jersey Nets point guard Jason Kidd refused to let his wife attend playoff games against the Celtics after fans at the Fleet Center started chanting "wife beater" in front of her and the couple's three-year-old son. Boston College fans are renowned for being racist.

The most telling anecdote, however, is this: After the Anaheim Angels' Gary Matthews, Jr., characterized spectators at Fenway as "loud, drunk, and obnoxious," as well as "racist," Red Sox CEO Larry Lucchino responded, "All I can say is: Has the man ever actually been in Yankee Stadium?" And there you have it: New York on the brain, all the time.

By Neel Shah   01/23/08 5:00 PM
Related: Gisele Bundchen, Please Come To Boston (Unless Youre Black), Pop, Rehab Roundup, Tom Brady
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