Another week, another lineup of late night shows with strange and largely unknown guests. As the writer's strike continues like a slow, throbbing hangover headache, Radar is here to tell you what you missed, and to award prizes to shows that are thriving (well, surviving) despite these tough times. We can be thankful no one resorted to reptiles to fill time this week, just birds, small primates, Heidi Montag, wild cats, and turtles (they're not reptiles, are they?)

MONDAY
David Letterman: Sarah Michelle Gellar (ghoul gutter) , Dan Patrick (sports talker)
Craig Ferguson: Sylvester Stallone (McCain endorser), Steve Wiebe (Donkey Kong champion)
Jay Leno: Simon Cowell (fashion inspiration) Ryan Seacrest (professional multi-tasker), Tavis Smiley (Enlightening, Encouraging, Empowering talker)
Conan O'Brien: Adam Sandler (onetime red sweatshirt lover), John Cena (raw meat)
Jimmy Kimmel: RERUN! Kathy Griffin (New Radical), Scott Baio (reality shows be damned, to us he'll always just be Charles in Charge)
Jon Stewart: Jon Meacham (self-loathing Newsweek editor)
Stephen Colbert: Allan Sloane (Senior Editor at Large, Fortune, recession explainer), Eric Weinder (author The Geography of Bliss, unhappiness cartographer/ journalist)

Winner for the night: We'll give it to Ferguson. We're so into GOP action stars today.

TUESDAY
David Letterman: John Edwards (embittered 3rd child), Diablo Cody (Oscar fairytale princess)
Craig Ferguson: Tony Shalhoub (Hank Azaria doppelgänger), Becki Newton (pretty on Ugly Betty)
Jay Leno: David Gregory (Brian Williams' fielder), Performing Birds
Conan O'Brien: Sean Hayes (least annoying element of Will & Grace)
Jimmy Kimmel: Kellie Pickler (American Idol success story)
Jon Stewart: Jim Wallis (author The Great Awakening: Reviving Faith & Politics in a a Post-Religious Right America)
Stephen Colbert: Malcolm Gladwell (pop intellectual, hapless fact checking victim, Ambassador Andrew Young (Former U.N. Ambassador, Stephen's new black friend)

Winner for the night: Letterman, easy, with a show that satisfies both our girl and man crushes. The dreamiest presidential candidate (probably not gonna vote for you, love to look at you) and the stripper-cum-Juno screenwriter.

WEDNESDAY
David Letterman: Charles Grodin (actor/TV commentator, author If I Only Knew Then . . . Learning From our Mistakes), NY Giants Kicker Lawrence Tynes (jock)
Craig Ferguson: Carmen Electra (brunette Jenny McCarthy), Justin Bartha (National Treasure), Margaret Cho (Sensuous Woman)
Jay Leno: Adam Carrolla (Howard Stern replacement), Richard Roeper (Siskel replacement)
Conan O'Brien: Dave Chappelle (attender of Monday's debates)
Jimmy Kimmel: Marilu Henner (see previous: friend of Jay, professional divorcée, sometimes actress)
Jon Stewart: P.J. O'Rourke (reader of long books, writer of shorter ones, promoting his On the Wealth of Nations)
Stephen Colbert: Marie Wood (Yellow Ribbon Fund, recipient of Stephen's wrist strong bracelet proceeds), Jeb Corliss (flying squirrel)

Winner for the night: Conan, by the crazy Dave Chappelle rule. Key Chapelle quote: "Don't think you're just gonna walk away from $50m and your wife's gonna be cool with it." Honorable mention to Colbert who's interview with the crazy flying dude was amusing, and we finally got to see all that bracelet cash go to someone.

THURSDAY
David Letterman: Julia Louis-Dreyfus (Elaine Benes forever)
T.J. Miller (one of the Cloverfield no-namers)
Craig Ferguson: Ringo Starr (performer of songs over 3 minutes)
Jay Leno: Julie Scardino (Sea World ambassador and animal chick), lemurs (small primates!), a small wild cat (very cute), turtles (not as cute), Chelsea Handler (kinda cute)
Conan O'Brien: John C. Reilly (Conan's singing partner)
Jimmy Kimmel: Heidi Montag (Maxim cover girl), Tank Abbott (fighter, not a lover), Chris Bennett (Aussie comedian)
Jon Stewart: Gerri Willis (Anchor, CNN's "Open House" -- gives good face, talks about how great the economy is)
Stephen Colbert: Debra Dickerson (MotherJones.com, not Stephen's new black friend), Charles Nesson (Harvard prof, online poker advocate)

Winner for the night: Do you even have to ask? Kimmel! Heidi wore a sequined dress that was more prom than late night. She then proceeded to describe The Hills as a "Young Sex and the City" (stretch?) and say "like" every other word. But, she did gloss over the broken engagement and her war with LC with poise...then she talked about her upcoming album! And, we learned she regularly prays for Lauren!!

GRAND PRIZE WEEKLY WINNER!!!
No one. America loses. Can the writer's strike please end?