SNOW WEISZ Rachel Weisz
Since the tween girls of today aren't exactly playing with dolls anymore, Disney is desperate to keep their brand of playthings relevant—even sexy—to the pop-culture savvy tots.

But how to conquer a demographic that's preoccupied with naughty Facebook gifts, who date-raped whom on Gossip Girl this week, and whether or not Miley Cyrus is pregnant? Why, tart up Cinderella, Pocohontas, and Ariel, of course.

To celebrate the 15th Anniversary of Disneyland Paris, the Mouse suits have concocted a plan to get high-fashion designers to craft new clothes for their beloved children's characters. Vivienne Westwood, Azzedine Alaia, and Luella Bartley are among those who've signed on to design the dresses, which will go on display later this month before being auctioned off to benefit UNICEF.

Given Westwood's penchant for bondage-inspired corsetry and Alaia's taste for second skin lycra, we have to wonder who will be trampier? Mulan with thigh-high boots and a whip? Or Belle, trading in her books for body-baring synthetics?

Either way, it's clear that fairy tales no longer sell themselves. In the latest round of Annie Leibovitz-shot ads for the mega-brand, Rachel Weisz is cast as Snow White and Roger Federer as King Arthur, a follow-up to last season's version which captured ScarJo as Cinderella, and David Beckham as Prince Charming.

Because, as we all know, nothing connotes childhood innocence like a troop of determined fashion consumers with an encyclopedic knowledge of Us Weekly's last 57 covers.